Why You Should Always Ask Why
Finding the answer to who, what, where, when and how are all very important steps toward reaching your goals… but without why, all the others have no meaning. The first five are the means, but the last one is the end. What purpose do the means have if there is no end?
That is why you should always ask why. It provides the footing and framework for all your goals, intentions, reasons, and purpose in life.
The Infinite “Why?” Of A Child
Think back to when you were a kid. Remember how “why?” was always the number one question on your mind?
Mom – “Let’s hop in the car and get to the bank before it closes!”
Kid – “Why?”
Mom – “So that I can deposit my paycheck, sweety.”
Kid – “Why?”
Mom – “So that we will have more money in our bank account.”
Kid – “Why?”
Mom – “So that daddy and I can spend money on the things we need. Things like food, rent, and other bills.”
Kid -“Why?”
Mom – “So that we can provide nutrients and shelter for our bodies.”
Kid – “Why?”
Mom – “So that we can survive.”
Kid – “Why?”
Mom – “Well… that is a good question. I suppose I don’t know. The answer to why we should survive is probably different for everyone. Now look what you made me do… you made me ponder! That is enough reasons why for now, ok honey?”
Kid – “Are we there yet?”
Mom – “Oh no… not that.”
As adults, we need to revive the constant curiosity we had as children. It is so easy to turn our blinders on and get trapped in our daily routines. Wake up, shower, eat breakfast, go to work, eat lunch, back to work, come home, watch TV, eat dinner, watch more TV, go to sleep. Rinse and repeat until a reasonable retirement is received.
We get so busy and involved that we forget to stop and think about why we are doing what we are doing.
Take Action And Find Your Goals, Intentions, Reasons, And Purpose
I encourage you all to simply take 5-10 minutes our of your day and ask one simple question: Why?
Ask this question and apply it to different areas of your life.
- Why do I work where I work? - Is my job or career synonymous with my passion? Do I feel satisfied at the end of the day with the work I have accomplished? Is there something I could be doing that would put me closer to my goals?
- Why do I eat what I eat? Am I eating what I am eating because it is healthy? Because it is fast? Because it is cheap? Because it is easy and convenient? Am I feeling unhealthy because of what I eat? Does satisfying my craving for unhealthy food truly make me happy?
- Why do I love what I love? Do I love it because I have a genuine respect, passion and interest for it? Do I love it because everyone else does? Do I love someone for who they are? Do I love someone because they love me?
- Why do I fear what I fear? Are there genuine reasons to fear what I fear? Is fear holding me back from what I truly desire? Are my fears irrational? Which of my fears are legitimate?
- Why do I hate what I hate? Is my hate benefiting me or others in any way? Is my hate fueled by any true logic or reason? Is my hate worth the time, energy, and effort? Is my hate stressing me out?
- Why do I desire to live simple? Do I live simple to reduce stress? Do I live simple because everyone else is? Do I live simple to save the environment? Do I live simple to save money? Do I live simple to become a better person in general?
- Why do I desire success? Is my definition of success based on my goals or on society’s expectations? Do I require success in order to be happy? Is a successful life the only kind of life worth living?
- Why do I desire happiness? Is happiness my ultimate goal in life? Am I happy now?
Take a look at your answers. If your reasons why are illegitimate or meaningless, then seriously think about changing that part of your life. If your reasons why are legitimate and meaningful, then embrace and support that part of your life.
One of the best things to ask why about is fear. Why do I fear failure? Why do I fear confrontation? Why do I fear judgement? In most of these cases, the worst case scenario is not as bad as we make it out to be, and our fear is alleviated through thought alone.
I would love to hear what conclusions you come to through these questions. Did it change your viewpoint on anything in your life? Post a comment below and let us know!
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This is a wonderful post. I am currently undertaking this and viewing it as a life inventory. My wife calls it a mid-life crisis. I wish I would have done something like this early on in life. When we get older and have families that depend on us it gets harder to make changes.
@ Dave Jones – I bet it is a lot easier to implement this kind of thinking earlier on life, for sure. I have not experienced your situation (I am 21) so I cannot say I know how it feels.
I can imagine that when you have a wife and kids that it becomes tricky to make adjustments in your life. You are no longer taking care of only yourself… but others too.
Do what you can, even if it is a small change here and there. Good luck, Dave!
- Jack Rugile
Simple Sapien
Hi Jack- A lot can be discovered by asking why. And, to continue asking why until we get to the REAL answer. Often we answer the first why with an easy answer, but if we dig deeper, that which troubles us, usually surfaces.
Great post!
Barbara Swaffords last blog post..Sometimes Thank You Is Not Enough
@ Barbara Swafford – Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. It is great to hear from fellow bloggers in the community. I have read a few of your posts and loved em. I will be checking into your blog more often!
That is true… finding the real answer sometimes requires a lot of patience. It is well worth the wait though.
- Jack Rugile
Simple Sapien
This is a great list of questions for my journaling time over the weekend. One of my deep WHY questions is why do I passionately want to help others practice the art of life balance. Thanks!
Stacey / Create a Balances last blog post..Practicing Being Selfish = Self Nurturing
Jack, this is really making me think. I’m going to spend some time this weekend on this exact exercise, and see where the answers lead me (or if they just generate more questions…). This just looks like such a simple, yet effective exercise to do. So, WHY haven’t I been doing it all along!!
Lances last blog post..Spread Your Wings and Fly
@ Stacey – Thanks for checking out my blog, I have been reading yours over the last few days and love what I see. Balance is incredibly important… I need more of it in my life.
@ Lance – Hehe, that is good question! It is just always healthy to be thinking, be aware, and always pondering the reasons you do things. I am glad you liked the post, see ya around!
- Jack Rugile
Simple Sapien
Well, “why questions” are those that are really thought-provoking. Oftentimes, they are the ones that rarely lead to a plausible answer. As adults, these should be the kind of questions that we should learn to ask.
Den Relojos last blog post..Board Exam Anxiety